Today is already a slow day - I'm feeling good and actually relaxed, rather than anxious. Anxiety has been a steady-state for me in the last month. So I am relieved to have August behind me. Sad thing is, you don't know you're going through a month of hell while you're in it. You just think you're in hell.

There's a trite saying: if you're going through hell, keep going.

That's true enough. So the month is over and onto September. It's been the fastest month yet, since Garcon was born. Craziness.

Last night we went for our evening constitutional. We ran into Bizzy again, who was running, again. Part of me envies being 20 - but the vast majority of me is happy to be where I am - a little wiser, mostly older.

We stopped at the 7-11 for milk. I ran in, picked out the right size bottle (too much for a half gal? do we only need 2 qts til tomorrow night?) Settlled on the one-gal, it was most economical. Sigh.

The owner, an elderly Sikh, was running the register. I was 3rd or 4th in line behind a couple of kids buying cigarettes and pilfering, also the weird guy buying lotto and semiporn. The owner was smiley and thoughtful - offered me the pennies in the jar - asked how the day was - have a great evening - please come again.

I walked out and DH commented on all the trash walking in and out of the joint. The kids who you don't want to be voting in 5 years, etc. Wouldn't let me walk there alone, at night, he said. I laughed and told him I was just thinking about how the nice Sikh must like young brunette women. Turns out, it's just because I was the only clean, non-pilfering customer all evening. Ah well, it's nice to think one is attractive anyway.